Jack Handey quotes

" It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man. " # Laughter

" I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people. " # Laughter # Prejudice # Love

" When you go for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges. " # Interviews # Censorship # Media

" I think in one of my previous lives I was a mighty king, because I like people to do what I say. " # Kings

" I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye. " # Culture # Fame # Gambling

" The other day I got out my can-opener and was opening a can of worms when I thought, What am I doing?! " # Problems

" On the other hand you have different fingers " # Language

" Sometimes I think the so-called experts actually ARE experts. " # Experts

" Blow ye winds, like the trumpet blows but without that noise. " # Leaders and Leadership # Noise # Death and Dying

" Whether they ever find life there or not, I think Jupiter should be considered an enemy planet. " # Passion # Enemies # Life and Living