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Jack Benny
: “Hors D'oeuvre: A ham sandwich cut into forty pieces”
# Food and Eating
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Jack Benny quote-“Hors D'oeuvre: A ham sandwich cut into forty pieces” ...
Wisdom feed seeded by this
quote
Be First To
Denis Waitley :
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Don't be a time manager, be a priority manager. Cut your major goals into bite-sized pieces. Each small priority or requirement on the way to ultimate goal become a mini goal in itself.
"
# Food and Eating
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George Konrad :
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Many people feel empty, a world that seemed so strong just collapsed. Forty years have been wasted on stupid strife for the sake of an unsuccessful experiment. The values gathered together have vanished, the strategies for survival have become ridiculous. And so forty years of our lives have become a story, a bad anecdote. But it may be possible to remember these adventures with a kind of irony.
"
# Food and Eating
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1
tweets
Sidonie Gabrielle Colette :
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Researchers, with science as their authority, will be able to cut [Animals] up, alive, into small pieces, drop them from a great height to see if they are shattered by the fall, or deprive them of sleep for sixteen days and nights continuously for the purposes of an iniquitous monograph... Animal trust, undeserved faith, when at last will you turn away from us? Shall we never tire of deceiving, betraying, tormenting animals before they cease to trust us?
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# Food and Eating
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Source Unknown :
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Plan well before you take the journey. Remember the carpenter's rule: Measure twice, cut once.
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# Food and Eating
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Bill Maher :
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New Rule: Stop introducing a new iPod every month. First came the original, then the Mini, then the Shuffle, now the Nano. It's so slim Kate Moss uses it to cut her cocaine.
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# Food and Eating
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Benjamin Franklin :
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I have always thought that one man of tolerable abilities may work great changes, and accomplish great affairs among mankind, if he first forms a good plan, and, cutting off all amusements or other employments that would divert his attention, make the execution of that same plan his sole study and business.
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# Food and Eating
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William Ford Gibson :
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The cutting of Sense/Net's ice took a total of nine days. "I said a week," Armitage said, unable to conceal his satisfaction when Case showed him his plan for the run. "You took your own good time." "Balls," Case said, smiling at the screen. "That's good work, Armitage." "Yes," Armitage admitted, "but don't let it go to your head. Compared to what you'll eventually be up against, this is an arcade toy."
"
# Food and Eating
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11
tweets
Gerald Barzan :
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Forty for you, sixty for me And equal partners we will be
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# Food and Eating
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Jean-Paul Marat :
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In order to ensure public tranquility, two hundred thousand heads must be cut off.
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# Food and Eating
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Barack Hussein Obama :
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A good compromise, a good piece of legislation, is like a good sentence; or a good piece of music. Everybody can recognize it. They say, 'Huh. It works. It makes sense.'
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# Food and Eating
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American Proverb :
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Cut your losses and let your profits run.
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# Food and Eating
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Jack Benny Wisdom feed
79
tweets
Jack Benny:
"
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
"
# Golf
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62
tweets
Jack Benny:
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I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis, and I don't deserve that, either.
"
# Confession
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10
tweets
Jack Benny:
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A scout troop consists of twelve little kids dressed like schmucks following a big schmuck dressed like a kid.
"
# Dissatisfaction
# Dress
# Children
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tweets
Jack Benny:
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It's not so much knowing when to speak, when to pause.
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# Speakers and Speaking
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6
tweets
Jack Benny:
"
I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early.
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# Cynics and Cynicism
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5
tweets
Jack Benny:
"
“Hors D'oeuvre: A ham sandwich cut into forty pieces”
"
# Food and Eating
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3
tweets
Jack Benny:
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“Gags die, humor doesn't”
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# Humor
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tweets
Jack Benny:
"
Comedy itself is based upon very old principles of which I can readily name seven. They are, in short: the joke, exaggeration, ridicule, ignorance, surprise, the pun, and finally, the comic situation.
"
# Comedy and Comedians
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Jack Benny:
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I don't want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.
"
# Exaggeration
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Jack Benny:
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My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
"
# Marriage
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![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=69499&author=Jack Benny"e=%E2%80%9CHors+D%27oeuvre%3A+A+ham+sandwich+cut+into+forty+pieces%E2%80%9D&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=22855&author=Denis Waitley"e=++Don%27t+be+a+time+manager%2C+be+a+priority+manager.+Cut+your+major+goals+into+bite-sized+pieces.+Each+small+priority+or+requirement+on+the+way+to+ultimate+goal+become+a+mini+goal+in+itself.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F395%2FDenis+Waitley_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=40408&author=George Konrad"e=++Many+people+feel+empty%2C+a+world+that+seemed+so+strong+just+collapsed.+Forty+years+have+been+wasted+on+stupid+strife+for+the+sake+of+an+unsuccessful+experiment.+The+values+gathered+together+have+vanished%2C+the+strategies+for+survival+have+become+ridiculous.+And+so+forty+years+of+our+lives+have+become+a+story%2C+a+bad+anecdote.+But+it+may+be+possible+to+remember+these+adventures+with+a+kind+of+irony.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F7397%2FGeorge_Konrad_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=28221&author=Sidonie Gabrielle Colette"e=++Researchers%2C+with+science+as+their+authority%2C+will+be+able+to+cut+%26%2391%3BAnimals%26%2393%3B+up%2C+alive%2C+into+small+pieces%2C+drop+them+from+a+great+height+to+see+if+they+are+shattered+by+the+fall%2C+or+deprive+them+of+sleep+for+sixteen+days+and+nights+continuously+for+the+purposes+of+an+iniquitous+monograph...+Animal+trust%2C+undeserved+faith%2C+when+at+last+will+you+turn+away+from+us%3F+Shall+we+never+tire+of+deceiving%2C+betraying%2C+tormenting+animals+before+they+cease+to+trust+us%3F&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F8939%2FSidonie+Gabrielle_Colette_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=22850&author=Source Unknown"e=++Plan+well+before+you+take+the+journey.+Remember+the+carpenter%27s+rule%3A+Measure+twice%2C+cut+once.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2Fimages_web%2Fauthor_no_icon.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=96510&author=Bill Maher"e=New+Rule%3A+Stop+introducing+a+new+iPod+every+month.+First+came+the+original%2C+then+the+Mini%2C+then+the+Shuffle%2C+now+the+Nano.+It%27s+so+slim+Kate+Moss+uses+it+to+cut+her+cocaine.%0A&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F5940%2FBill_Maher_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=22785&author=Benjamin Franklin"e=++I+have+always+thought+that+one+man+of+tolerable+abilities+may+work+great+changes%2C+and+accomplish+great+affairs+among+mankind%2C+if+he+first+forms+a+good+plan%2C+and%2C+cutting+off+all+amusements+or+other+employments+that+would+divert+his+attention%2C+make+the+execution+of+that+same+plan+his+sole+study+and+business.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F165%2FBenjamin_Franklin_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=84229&author=William Ford Gibson"e=The+cutting+of+Sense%2FNet%27s+ice+took+a+total+of+nine+days.+%22I+said+a+week%2C%22+Armitage+said%2C+unable+to+conceal+his+satisfaction+when+Case+showed+him+his+plan+for+the+run.+%22You+took+your+own+good+time.%22+%22Balls%2C%22+Case+said%2C+smiling+at+the+screen.+%22That%27s+good+work%2C+Armitage.%22+%22Yes%2C%22+Armitage+admitted%2C+%22but+don%27t+let+it+go+to+your+head.+Compared+to+what+you%27ll+eventually+be+up+against%2C+this+is+an+arcade+toy.%22&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F13978%2FWilliam+Ford_Gibson_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=32577&author=Gerald Barzan"e=++Forty+for+you%2C+sixty+for+me+And+equal+partners+we+will+be&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1404%2FGerald+Barzan_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=97054&author=Jean-Paul Marat"e=In+order+to+ensure+public+tranquility%2C+two+hundred+thousand+heads+must+be+cut+off.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F12875%2FJean-Paul_Marat_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=45084&author=Barack Hussein Obama"e=A+good+compromise%2C+a+good+piece+of+legislation%2C+is+like+a+good+sentence%3B+or+a+good+piece+of+music.+Everybody+can+recognize+it.+They+say%2C+%27Huh.+It+works.+It+makes+sense.%27&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F8013%2FBarack_Obama_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=32718&author=American Proverb"e=++Cut+your+losses+and+let+your+profits+run.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F678%2FAmerican+Proverb_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=69497&author=Jack Benny"e=Give+me+golf+clubs%2C+fresh+air+and+a+beautiful+partner%2C+and+you+can+keep+the+clubs+and+the+fresh+air.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=40844&author=Jack Benny"e=++I+don%27t+deserve+this+award%2C+but+I+have+arthritis%2C+and+I+don%27t+deserve+that%2C+either.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=59182&author=Jack Benny"e=A+scout+troop+consists+of+twelve+little+kids+dressed+like+schmucks+following+a+big+schmuck+dressed+like+a+kid.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=30083&author=Jack Benny"e=++It%27s+not+so+much+knowing+when+to+speak%2C+when+to+pause.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=69503&author=Jack Benny"e=I+went+to+a+meeting+for+premature+ejaculators.+I+left+early.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=69501&author=Jack Benny"e=%E2%80%9CGags+die%2C+humor+doesn%27t%E2%80%9D&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=69507&author=Jack Benny"e=Comedy+itself+is+based+upon+very+old+principles+of+which+I+can+readily+name+seven.+They+are%2C+in+short%3A+the+joke%2C+exaggeration%2C+ridicule%2C+ignorance%2C+surprise%2C+the+pun%2C+and+finally%2C+the+comic+situation.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=3679&author=Jack Benny"e=++I+don%27t+want+to+tell+you+how+much+insurance+I+carry+with+the+Prudential%2C+but+all+I+can+say+is%3A+when+I+go%2C+they+go+too.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}
![Powerpoint](http://www.iwise.com/downloadPPT.php?quote_id=61361&author=Jack Benny"e=My+wife+Mary+and+I+have+been+married+for+forty-seven+years+and+not+once+have+we+had+an+argument+serious+enough+to+consider+divorce%3B+murder%2C+yes%2C+but+divorce%2C+never.&image=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.iwise.com%2FauthorIcons%2F1544%2FJack_Benny_64x64.png){kind=link}