Funny Quotes

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Any quote mentioning the word : funny

Funny:

(humorous) A joke.
(UK) A narrow boat for sculling.

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10 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "We are the ones we have been waiting for." #Funny

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6 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "You notice that people who've been in Washington too long, they don't talk like ordinary folks,. We had this debate in Las Vegas, and somebody asked me, "What are your weaknesses?" So I said, "Well, you know, I don't keep track of paper that well, I'm always losing paper, my desk is a mess." And then they asked the next two candidates. And one candidate says, "Well, my biggest weakness is I'm just so passionate about helping poor people." And then the other one says, "I'm just so impatient to help the American people solve their problems." So then I realize well, I wish I'd gone last and then I would have known.. I'm stupid that way, I thought that when they asked what your biggest weakness was, they asked what your biggest weakness was. And now I know that my biggest weakness is I like to help old ladies across the street." #Funny

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5 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "Now that's my phone buzzing there. I don't want you to think I'm getting fresh or anything." #Funny

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4 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "Our preference would be to get a shelter dog, but, obviously, a lot of shelter dogs are mutts like me." #Funny

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3 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "Yesterday, John McCain actually said that if he's president that he'll take on, and I quote, "the old boys network in Washington." Now I'm not making this up. This is somebody who's been in Congress for twenty-six years, who put seven of the most powerful Washington lobbyists in charge of his campaign. And now he tells us that he's the one who's gonna take on the old boys network. The old boys network? In the McCain campaign that's called a staff meeting. Come, on!" #Funny

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1 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "You can put lipstick on a pig. It's still a pig." #Funny

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1 tweets

Barack Hussein Obama: "It's not because John McCain doesn't care. It's because John McCain doesn't get it." #Funny

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Barack Hussein Obama: "Ok, look, you know, when I was a kid, I inhaled frequently. That was the point." #Funny

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Barack Hussein Obama: "Most people who meet my wife quickly conclude that she is remarkable. They are right about this. She is smart, funny and thoroughly charming. Often, after hearing her speak at some function or working with her on a project, people will approach me and say" #Funny

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Barack Hussein Obama: "Pot had helped, and booze; maybe a little blow when you could afford it. Not smack [heroin] though." #Funny

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Humanity's biggest problems aren't what you think they are

Oxford philosopher and transhumanist Nick Bostrom examines the future of humankind and asks whether we might alter the fundamental nature of humanity to solve our most intrinsic problems.

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